Monday, February 26, 2018

Dearest Arianna...


Dearest Arianna,

You're almost six months old, and I don't know how I've waited this long to write you a letter. Apparently, it really is a second child thing, but it's been tough keeping up with everything I did for your brother. 

I was so scared to lose you. I wrote you one tiny note once, but I was sobbing the whole time. I was terrified. The thought of losing you was too much, and it was constantly on my mind after losing a baby before you. I was trying to protect you, and it was too hard to write a vulnerable letter. I never sang to you or spoke to you. I hesitated to get excited when I felt you move. 

But Arianna, my sweet, sweet girl, how I have made up for those scary nine months. I love you so much. You are the girl I always wanted but was afraid would never have. You look like your daddy, and you have more of his demeanor -- soft, calm, happy, and patient. You are the sweetest little being I've ever held, and I have fallen over from the weight love has had on me since I first saw you, and I know that will never change.

Thank you for giving me more joy than I thought possible. You have no idea how much I adore you, and you never will, but you are such a gift. I find myself wanting to be with you all the time. You're my little mini-me, and it is amazing. 

Please forgive me for not writing you sooner. I just had to get through the fear of losing you before I could love you with everything I have.

You are truly the sweetest little baby I've ever met--and I'm not just saying that because you're mine.

I love you, Aria.

Mommy


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